tl;dr - The secret is that parents who choose to raise children are better equipped than those who became parents without planning. And I agree, and I support the rights of all parents.
But do we really need to erase bi/pansexual people like this? Do we need to ignore people who made the same healthy choices with a different gender partner (even straight ones)?
Besides, the research doesn’t even say that gay parents are better. They “found no differences between children raised in homes with two heterosexual parents and children raised with lesbian parents.” And two men? The reserchers didn’t have data at all, only a suspicion. No, seriously.
You might be thinking “so what? People have been discriminating against same-sex parents for decades, isn’t this trivial when compared to our need to push for real rights?” Not if it leaves bi and pansexual parents behind. Not if it sets up a false struggle of “gays vs straights” as to who can most win at parenting.
If we want to take the science and the social issues seriously, we need to stand up and say “hey, gay parents are not better than straight ones. They’re equal. And that’s why we demand equality.”
P.S. - Also trans erasure, in that “only kids of straight couples are a surprise” way. Can’t believe I left that out at first, being genderqueer and all. *facepalm*