Nerd is my Gender
What's yours?
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They found that bullies were just as capable of understanding right from wrong as defenders. However, bullies were the group most likely to underestimate their influence on others—a step that could help them justify their hurtful behavior. Interestingly, the opposite pattern was observed in victims: They were less able to determine right from wrong but were more emotionally aware of how their behavior influences others. Taken together, these findings suggest a two-way approach to reducing the negative consequences of bullying: helping bullies become more aware of the harm they cause and teaching victims to identify unjust behavior when it occurs.
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This is Aiden. Pretty cute, right? He looks like your average, fun loving teenager.
But he isn’t. He wasn’t.
Aiden no longer walks this earth with us. Why?
Aiden wasn’t always Aiden. When he was born, he was a girl by the name of Caitlin. When he hit highschool, Caitlin began to feel as though something wasn’t right. At first a lesbian, Caitlin realized that perhaps she wasn’t even Caitlin. Perhaps she wasn’t even a girl. That’s when Aiden was born.
The school that Aiden and I attended tried to accommodate Aiden’s needs as best they could. They gave him the key to the one stall unisex teacher’s bathroom, they tried to change his name from Caitlin to Aiden on all of his classes’ rosters. But not everyone could be so kind. Some teachers treated him differently, even refusing to call him Aiden. And the students? They called him cruel names, made fun of him, and even referred to him as a girl expressly against his wishes. I was so proud of Aiden when he got his name legally changed as well as his gender. I remember being elated when he told me he was going to start testosterone. He was finally getting what he wanted. He was going to make his outside match who he was on the inside.
Unfortunately, he dropped out of school in the middle of his junior year, unable to take the taunts anymore. He told me he was going to come back when his year graduated, and graduate with my class.
That never happened.
On April 22nd, of 2010, sometime in the early hours of the morning, Aiden hanged himself.
At approximately 9:10 that morning, I found out that one of my dearest friends committed suicide. I honestly can’t find words to describe the hollowness I felt.
I’m sure there were other extraneous reasons that caused him to take his life, however it is certain that the years of torment he endured, the torment that lasted up until his finally days, was a leading factor in his decision to kill himself.
This bullying, the bullying that stole one of my favorite people from me can be stopped. But it won’t go away on it’s own.
It’s up to you to take a stand against these acts of unkindness. If you hear someone in the hallway say the word “fag”, or even worse, if you see a peer being harassed, don’t just walk away. Say something. Stand up for the kid, or make it known that some people are offended by the cruel words others use. Losing a good friend is one of the most terrible feelings I have ever experienced, and probably will ever experience. And worst of all, it could happen to anyone.
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Tim Minchin decides to end the anti-fat hate.
An update to the above-linked post.
http://www.npr.org/templates/transcript/transcript.php?storyId=138783861
MINCHIN: … if you get offended by my song about the Pope, for example, which is not playable on air, but is very, very carefully constructed, I’m fine with that and I can argue it and I can take the anger. But if you got cross with me about one of my earlier songs that I did, for example, called “Fat Children,” eventually I went yeah, actually, you guys are right. It’s just bullying.
Glad to hear that one of my skeptical heroes is able to admit when he’s wrong and to become a better person.
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10-year-old trans girl on being bullied by adults and accepted by her peers
This girl’s experience is a pretty great refutation of “won’t somebody think of the children!”-type moral panic. Actually, seems like the kids will be fine, provided adults don’t poison them with their own hateful ideas.
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I always say how bullied I am, but no one listens, what do I have to do so people will listen to me?
The late 14-year-old Jamey Rodemeyer, a victim of relentless anti-gay bullying, tagged “last rant”. How many more have to die before people will realize it doesn’t get better until we make it better?
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Bullies Continue To Taunt Gay Teen Who Committed Suicide
What a great feat of bravery and skill it is to taunt a dead person. What courage! What magnanimity!
You might think that the people who bullied 14-year-old Jamey Rodemeyer with comments like “JAMIE IS STUPID, GAY, FAT ANND UGLY. HE MUST DIE!” are completely ashamed of themselves now that Jamey committed suicide. However, you’d be wrong. The problem is you’re thinking like someone who isn’t utterly disgusting.
In an appearance on the Today show, Jamey’s parents, Tracy and Tim, revealed that bullies were celebrating his death at a dance his sister attended. Tracy says:
“She was having a great time, and all of a sudden a Lady Gaga song came on, and they all started chanting for Jamey, all his friends. Then the bullies that put him into this situation started chanting, ‘You’re better off dead!’ ‘We’re glad you’re dead!’ and things like that. My daughter came home all upset. It was supposed to be a time for her to grieve and have fun with her friends, and it turned into bullying even after he’s gone.”
Tim adds, “I can’t grasp it in my mind … I don’t know why anyone would do that. They have no heart, that’s basically what it comes down to.” You can watch the full interview below … then curl into a ball and weep for humanity.
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Principal Physically Attacks Student for Advocating GSA
I frequently hear people respond to bullying issues with “why don’t they fight back? Why don’t they get help?” This is why. Fighting back will only get the student punished. Getting help could lead to further ridicule from classmates or even teachers. Plus many teachers don’t even feel they have the legal standing to offer the support that they’d like. We cannot expect the most vulnerable members of society to provide for their own protection! This change cannot come from the bottom, it must be a top-down action. It doesn’t get better until we make it better.
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Hate Group Self-Destructs
Call it schadenfreude if you must, but I love watching a hate group self-destruct. I’ll save you the mental anguish of trying to read that entire email and share the highlights:
Money is so tight here that I have had to scale back important pro-family campaigns.
There is no chance of Presidential opposition. We need to stop the Gay Bill of Special Rights ourselves, now!
This means we are going to have to work twice as hard and spend ten times more money in order to stop the bill in Congress.
Money that your Public Advocate doesn’t have as I write this letter.
Donations to my office are not keeping up with the need.
I am in a dilemma like I’ve never been in before.
You see, my office does not receive any tax funds for its important campaigns.
I must ask you to keep the information I am about to give you confidential.
If it gets into the hands of the Homosexual Lobby, they will use it to destroy me while we are weak:
My office owes $88,129.34 to Larry and other small businessmen in Virginia.
I hope you don’t think badly of me. Some of this is now sixty days past due. It’s not a major crisis for the small businessmen or me. Not yet.
I absolutely must raise $107,372.19 in the next 25 days to pay past bills and keep programs going.
If I am not able to raise the money, I don’t know what I will do.
I don’t know how I can keep fighting.
I can’t go on fighting against the radical Homosexual Lobby if I don’t raise the money to pay the bills. And I shudder to think of what will happen if the liberals in Washington go unchecked…
I asked my friends to sign an important petition. And I am so thankful to my friends who signed their petitions.
But only 2 of every 10 people to whom I wrote responded. That was less than I hoped for.
I felt as if I were all alone.
And it hurt.
And today as I look at the bills my office owes and all of the work that is ahead of me, I feel alone again.
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New Law Protects Christians Who Bully Gay Kids
Democrat Senator Gretchen Whitmer speaks out against the bill being passed.
“So this might solve a political problem that Republicans have. but be clear: You are papering over the problem that is a reality faced by hundreds of kids in Michigan schools every day. In fact, not only does this not protect kids who are bullied, it further endangers them by legitimizing excuses for tormenting a student. And the saddest and sickest irony of this whole thing is that it’s called ‘Matt’s Safe School Law’. And after the way that you’ve gutted it, it wouldn’t have done a damn thing to save Matt!
This is worse than doing nothing! It’s a Republican license to bully.”
She speaks words I cannot, for every time I open my mouth, all that comes out is “grrr…”
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I saw hundreds of these on Twitter when #tomyunbornchild was trending. Also against atheists, with the same threats. It’s disgusting, and it’s real, and letting it slide is not the solution.
PSA of the Day: “It’s easy to dehumanize hate speech online because we’ve gotten so used to seeing it,” says writer/director Charlotte Moore. “We tell ourselves that it’s the product of trolls, of random, anonymous strangers. Except they’re not. They’re real people. Many of them will be parents. And some of their children will be gay.”
Her new PSA brings to life the worst of the tweets with Twitter hashtag #tomyunbornchild, which was trending worldwide in March. The hashtag — unintentionally — encouraged many users to spout hate toward LGBT children.
[huffpo]
(Source: thedailywhat)
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I’m an American living in St Louis, Missouri. I’m young, I’m white, I’m a parent, I’m an atheist. And I’m queer. It’s not a crime to be any of those things, and it’s not a crime to say any of those things. It’s okay to say “gay”.
(Source: youtube.com)
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http://oktosaygay.org/
Missouri won’t back off its attack of queer youth in our schools. Please sign sign the petition and add your voice! (Also, check out my vid on that page, “from Andy”.)
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Last week, as part of a cultural discovery project for one of my classes, I spent three days wearing ‘girls’ clothes while going about my day. I wanted to explore the general reaction and preconceptions that people in my city have to clothing, especially in regards to gender…
By day’s end, I feared a full-on breakdown, unable to stand up for myself or what I believed in to maintain the integrity of the observer’s perspective. In a way, I had no right to feel that way, mostly because of the realization that this is the way that many have to live their lives. I fought back tears as every stare and ill-formed word engrained themselves in my sub-conscious.
Though I may not know you, I think that it’s important that we all come to understand why these things happen. In my book, cat-calling, shaming and harassment are among the worst actions we can engage in. As a heterosexual male, I will never truly know the fear that women may experience while walking home from work, going see a friend for lunch, or being sized-up in public based on their clothing. I will never truly know the gut-rot that a transgender individual may feel while being eyed up and down at the store or in class, strangers seeming to think as if the clothing they see before them begs a legal invitation of ridicule. I will never truly know the plights of these people, but as an ally and a human being invested in true equality, it is now my obligation to stand up for them as if I did.
I wish every single person would have the ability to walk one day in the shoes (literally, as is the case) of a person that society places underneath them. Perhaps then hate would melt away into understanding.
Genderqueer with a touch of happy humanism.
