How sick do I make this person? Let us count the ways!
Phew, safe here - not a christian.
I’ve haven’t yet heard of the musical genre that is sex-drugs-rock, but I imagine it will be all over the Grammys in a couple years.
This is a tough one… many times what seems like a regular period is actually a very early miscarriage, so I’ll put this one down as a “maybe”.
I haven’t played a good game of Pin the Tail on the Donkey for many years, and it’s been a while since my last pinata.
I prefer generic mixed nuts as opposed to the licensed kind, as they cost much less.
At first I wondered why this wasn’t included under the “lazy Christian” category, and then I remembered that Catholics actually have to work for their salvation.
Alas, I am still not a cybog.
People that watch TV more than study the Bible.
This… actually doesn’t apply to me. Wow.
People that talk to pets more than God
I don’t think anyone could possibly talk to pets more than God does, but I have neither pets nor god.
Fox Hole Religion
Yeah, I agree: on the battle field is a horrible place to try to distract soldiers from their duties with nonsense.
The Jews that are from the Synagogue of Satan
There is no Synagogue of Satan, but just in case anyone was thinking of starting one, don’t - you might make someone sick, and then they’ll put you on a list.
Those bother me too. Hmm… maybe I should be the one holding this sign?
I feel you there, bro.
This must be the 1st Church of Ke$ha.
There goes half the nation, including anyone who’s ever watch the Oprah show and liked it.
Oh yeah, like mosquitoes! I hate mosquitoes!
Dykes on Bikes
Come on, they’re just trying to do their part to reduce CO2 emissions.
I’m probably not capitalist enough for this.
Child Molesting Homosexuals
This definitely is a redundant listing, as priests would fall under the umbrella of Roman Catholics above.
This one might actually apply to me. After all, I like to do it with the lights on and the sheets off.
I’m trying to reform, I swear!
Envious that they get their own planet? Admit it.
Well, that’s it. Adding up the tally, I score like 1.5 on the How Sick I Make This Person scale. I’m kind of disappointed, actually. I had no idea I’m so straight-edge! How about you?