The paradigm of “women trade sex to men for affection / favors / security / etc.” is an extremely dangerous one. Because it posits that women never really want sex, it makes the bright line of “no, this time I really don’t want it” fuzzy, as if this were merely a breakdown in the bargaining process. It makes women seem unreasonable or even greedy for refusing sex when they’ve been properly “compensated” (see also: PUA culture) and makes men feel that sex with a woman who doesn’t want sex isn’t fundamentally abnormal. And this is why being extremely public about being an extremely horny woman is fighting rape.

Many of us already knew that cops nationwide have a long history of crossing the line of duty and getting sexually aggressive with women. For years, stories have surfaced of on-duty police around the country allegedly groping, harassing–and yes, masturbating onto–women.

Quite the disturbing read, and a reminder that nobody is completely safe from sexual assault.

My boyfriend tells me he thinks that in some cases, rape victims are partially to blame for their rapes; for example if they didn’t take “enough” precautionary measures. I tell him how upsetting it is for me to hear this, because it means if I were ever to get raped, I’ll know he thinks I’m partially to blame for it, because I “wasn’t careful enough.”

He then gets mad at me for making him feel guilty for sharing his opinion, telling me that if this is how I’m going to act every time he expresses his thoughts, he won’t want to open up to me.


But guess what happens when women take note of his sort of attitude and adopt a Schrodinger’s Rapist mentality? They’re to blame in that situation too!




Get comfy, it’s a long one.

So three times when I’ve been outwardly speaking against rape jokes I have been told to watch George Carlin’s routine on rape. They think watching it will just completely change my opinion on rape jokes.

1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys will be sexually assaulted by the time they are 18. When you tell a rape joke, chances are you are telling it in front of a rape victim/survivor. For one second do you think your right to laugh at someone else’s real experience tops the right of a victim/survivor to try and carry on with life without their trauma being the butt of a joke?

Click link for more.

man cracking whip which is in flames

Child molestation is serious business.  The person most likely to harm a child is someone ze knows, not a stranger.  If a young person you know comes to you, and admits to an unwelcome experience with an adult, don’t jump to conclusions.  I know it may seem like “but he’s such a trusted family friend, he’d never do that!”  But of all the people I know who have been molested, it was always by a relative or close friend of the family.  Why?  Because those are the only people who have access to alone-time with children on a regular basis.  Food for thought.

And, you know, politics aside, the success of Sarah Palin and women like her is good for all women - except, of course —those who will end up, you know, like, paying for their own rape ‘kit ‘n’ stuff, But for everybody else, it’s a win-win. Unless you’re a gay woman who wants to marry your partner of 20 years - whatever. But for most women, the success of conservative women is good for all of us. Unless you believe in evolution. You know - actually, I take it back. The whole thing’s a disaster.